Speaking of Stephen's office hours, I've already got some things planned for April 1st on campus ;) Yes, I am 19 and still celebrate the wonderful holiday that is April Fools' Day. It makes me happy, and if it's done correctly, makes other people quite happy as well. How could there be anything wrong with that?
So... There's a GALL meeting the night before the special day, so hopefully we'll get that over with before too it gets too late. I'll still have to go out and do my things before I go to bed. I'm certain everyone else in the club enjoys the holiday at least as much as I do, so hopefully we'll plan something great--and nothing that'll detract from my personal shenanigans.
I have lots of ideas for the general public and two specific ideas for someone whom I think will appreciate my madness. I just need a few measurements, a few more "observations," and a trip or two to the store for some supplies.
I'm so excited, and I won't squick out! Wooooooohoooooooo!
All of this talk of practical jokes is making me think about going round and round with Drew back in high school. I also went round and round with Bunwich, but I got him a whole lot more than he got me.
Drew loved to torment me, but he couldn't stand it when I retaliated. Shortly after we met in art class my sophomore year, he started adding dirty little pictures and phrases to my drawings. Sometimes they were easily removed or worked over, but occasionally there was one or two that were quite visible even in the finished work. He also added his own artistic flair to my own body, dumping handfuls of glitter over my head and smearing green modeling clay over my entire back. He was very upset the day I blew a palmful of glitter in his general direction, but we continued to joke around together.
Junior year consisted of mostly verbal harassment from both parties. I won't go into that very much, as I've got quite a few "dirty little secrets" that I flat-out brought upon myself...and so does Drew :) Rob will tell you all of the times Drew would run up to us as we were saying our afternoon goodbyes. Sometimes we'd do all sorts of crazy things in Rob's yard, like the time Drew demanded a ride on the back of my car. I went really slowly, truly concerned for his safety, and then slammed on my brakes as hard as possible and with no warning, which sent Drew stumbling off the back of my old Taurus and fighting for his footing.
Senior year was when I really worked up some gall. The simplest trick I ever did was slightly moving Drew's chair from the lunch table as he sat down. He was furious as he explained that he could have been seriously injured and that I wouldn't like for him to do that to me. Meh, I wouldn't necessarily LIKE it, but I'd definitely see the humor in it (unless I threw out my hip, but that's what painkillers are for!). I didn't even attempt a full chair removal; I knew the mere thought of it would get enough of a rise out of him.
For my birthday, Gretchen brought "lobster cupcakes." They were bright red and had whistles on top of them which we thoroughly enjoyed during our lunch period and in the time after school where we played in the parking lot each afternoon. Drew begged us for a cupcake, and immediately unwrapped it for a big bite. He was standing within my reach, so he was fair game for my tricks. I slightly tapped the bottom of the cupcake as he leaned in for a bite, and he was amazingly close to a faceful of sickeningly sweet red icing. Once again, I didn't actually want to squish cupcake all over his face. Just the thought of looking so silly was mortifying enough for him.
The worst thing I ever did to Drew, though, was when I was chewing gum while sitting beside him. I often chew gum for stress relief purposes, so it was never abnormal for me to pop a piece of peppermint gum even at the most odd moments. I'd chew for several minutes as normal, and then I'd pretend to spit my gum into my fingers. Then, I'd press my pinched fingers toward his hair and...well, I've never seen anyone jump away from me the way he did each time I attempted this. Sure, I'd be pretty angry if someone actually put a nasty wad of gum in my hair, but pretending isn't a big deal.
Drew continued to torment me by wasting my time, turning up my radio to ridiculously loud levels, and reaching into the driver's seat to honk my horn at other drivers at inappropriate times. Rob also did that last one on several occasions, as well as jacking up the bass and volume every time we listened to the classical station.
If I may digress, Rob also played a very good prank on me one day at the grocery store. Whether it was premeditated or spontaneous I will never know, but I thought it was brilliant all the same. I had to pick up some distilled water one afternoon, and Rob, being a gentleman, offered to go in for me. I handed over the money and waited out in the car while he shopped, and shortly after he placed the bag into the back seat and buckled up in the front beside me. He said something along the lines of, "Okay, we can go now that we have the filtered spring water..." I was speechless because he'd so quickly forgotten the type of water I asked him to get. Then he started to laugh, reassured me that he'd gotten distilled water, and explained that he just wanted to see my reaction. It probably doesn't sound that impressive in writing, but I thought it was really funny and I completely went for it. Digression complete.
After we all graduated, we decided to go to homecoming together for a sort of alumni meeting. I allowed Drew to use window chalk on my car and...well, the results weren't all that pleasant. I also happened to have two cans of silly string in the back of my car, and Drew hijacked both of them. I managed to take back one of the cans (It was fair for him to have one!) once we arrived at the school, but Drew complained that he didn't want it on his clothes and skillfully snatched my only ammunition from my arms. Our silly string battle turned into a one-sided massacre as I took the whole of two cans. In case you didn't know, that's a WHOLE LOT of gunky string.
I kind of feel like a jerk now that I've skimmed back over all of that stuff I did to Drew. I know I would've been able to take back anything I did to the poor kid, but I don't think he took any of it quite like I would have--even though he was much more merciless than I was when it came to dishing it out.
Bunwich was also quite easy to get, but he took it like a real bunwich and was quite slick about returning my favors. I threw a lot of paper balls at him. I remember that very clearly. I also liked to pluck pink feathers from Mrs. Crowther's feather duster and stick them in his hair, tape them to his binder, or tuck them with his things. When he discovered them, they always ended up in my hair. One day, I started taping "LOSER" signs to his personal belongings and to his back. Eventually, he caught on and I started to find those same signs taped on my back later in the day. I tried to fill our box fan up with paper confetti once. It was mostly a fail, even though a few pieces blew out onto Bunwich as soon as he turned on the fan. Later on during that class period, I attempted to step over the fan and tripped.
Sigh. I miss Latin and the electronic classroom...
I have no idea where I was going with any of that. I think I was just reminiscing. If you followed me with all of that, I applaud you. Have a cupcake. (Squish.)
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